Monday, May 12, 2014

New Yorker Cartoons But Guess Who Wrote the Captions For These Ones? I Did.

"Well, I'll tell you what's wrong: that salesgirl was extremely rude to me. Extremely rude."

 
"Anyway, that's the last time I saw my sister alive."


"I told you I had a giant needle in the other room."
"Just a salad, thanks."

"I'd like to officially offer you the position. Congratulations!"

"So finally Beth agreed that if we split...WHAT THE FUCK!! OH MY GOD!!  OH MY GOD!!  WHAT THE FUCK!!"

3 comments:

Greg F. said...

These actually are better than the real NYT captions.

John said...

AHHH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA

These are great, Bill. Really great. I haven't laughed this hard in, jeez, who knows...

Oh, hang on a second... ah, now I get it, the captions actually go with the pictures over them. My mistake. Okay, let me try this again...

Nope. Sorry. Terrible. And what's more, dreadfully offensive, an evil affront to all the values human society holds dear, each laughlessly insensitive gag worse than the last. In fact, I really regret the time I wasted on this entire risible business, and the time I continue to waste on mulling it over and growing ever more outraged by its monstrous obscenity. I really thought such abominations were things of the past. You have declared all-out war on Goodness and Decency, sir, and I for one shall have no part of it. Good day to you.

bill r. said...

But what about the one with the pig, though?

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