I've never told any of you about this, but my day job is writing video games for Japanese game companies. Basically, I write the story, and the basic instructions, send those off to Japan, and then wait for the cash to roll in. This Christmas, I have a new one coming out, and I just received the translation of my work back from Kyoto. I think this one's going to be pretty big. Jump on the train now, folks.
Yakuza Scroll: Shoot Quickly or Die Fast
Background History:
In 1945 a America attack Japan with new scientific bomb called “nuclear bomb”. No one survives. The survivors rebuilt there cities, and Japan now is a succeed. Is there many strong buildings? Yes! Is there many success business? Yes. Is there many nice dance house? Yes. Is there many strong honorable? Yes!
But maybe a America bomb realize a demon spirit? Maybe! His name is Moromoto Shinji the Snake Zone, and waits under Succeed Japan…!
Today:
Today you are Steve G., of Kyoto Police Force (KPF) and you are a Kyoto Police Office. You work to destroy to incredible Yakuza, who bring nightmare world to today. Your gun is a 15 inch Super Steel Bullet Range with Laser Mounted Scope Device. You are a accurate shoot from one hundred yards! You work hard and live alone and wonder sometimes a “Why is my world so full of this night mares!?” You work hard to bring down Yakuza Gangster Sarukanji and his gang of murderous called Blossom strike.! For to help you, you are is a partner named Keiko of Kyoto Police Force (KPF) Lesbian Crime Squid.
And what is this Yakuza Scroll? It is your job to find out how or Sarukanji will realize Moromoto Shinji for ultimate super night mares!
Controls:
To shoot, press AABBCA button
For supplement, press AABBCA and CDBBA button
For to dance, press UP key.
For to not dance, DON'T PRESS!
If you run, use controller keys.
For to pick up device, enjoy BBDA buttons TWICE
For to drop device, enjoy buttons differently.
Okay fine, Steve G.! The timing for your adventures is arrived. And don't forget this: enjoy your time, for shoot quickly…or die fast!
for Comment make press arrow arrow BAAC.
ReplyDeleteThe control part of this entry is exactly why I didn't keep up with video games beyond Super Nintendo. It went from "Shoot - Press B" to "Shoot - Press B A Up Up Down" because they had to also incorporate the other 73 moves you could make into six buttons, two top buttons, four arrow keys and a joystick. Screw that. I just want to sidescroll, jump and fire.
There are various reasons why I haven't kept up with video games, but that's one of them.
ReplyDeleteI don't play video games at all anymore, but I wrote this a while ago for a forum created and used only by my brothers and me. So I'm recycling posts already!
But I have thought I would like to put some humor pieces up here and there, so I figured what the hell.
A fine idea my friend. Humor pieces are always welcome in a sometimes stodgy blogosphere.
ReplyDelete